More racing less modelling photo shoots.

Haven't done a lot of mountain bike racing of late, been too busy with press interviews and glamour modelling photo shoots, so decided to sort all that and get dirty and enter a round of the NDuro, so packed up Trudi and the kids under the guise of a "family holiday" and put the trusty Anthem into the boot.

After a quick stop to take in the view of the magnificent Mount Ruapehu on a stunning morning,




we arrived at the Alpin motel in Rotorua a truely great motel where the owner appreciates the needs of mountain bikers , with his fine hot pools and friendly service, hes even installed a MTB Wash pit and always invites us back after the race for a hot shower before we head home.

Jonny Waghorn/ Wonny Jaghorn can never remember which also decided to rip up the vegas trails on his single speed, so he and the lovely Belinda also stayed at the Alpin, for dinner we went to a wonderful rotorua restaurant and enjoyed the local bugers from the childerns menu.



Actually we didn't, the place looked shit, so went next door for a nice Thai meal.

Race day arrived and it was freezing cold, -1 on the mercury but the sun was shining, was going to be a awesome day. At the race start there was a large contingent from Wellington, presumably all coming up to score the free PNP entry, damn I thought I would be a shoe in for that.

Race starts and I got off to my usual poor start, about 20th into the first long climb, but felt strong so reached into the suitcase and pulled out a large serving of "Joels Tempo tm". I kept passing riders until I came into free air and up ahead all I could see was Garth, T-Rex, and Anton, I passed Garth rolling 8rpm in probably a 42/11 and scampered off up the track to the summit and into the first single track, however my lack of skill and local knowledge soon saw Garth steaming up from behind. I thought great I will stick with him for a bit and I did for 10 seconds before he steamed off into the distance never to be seen again. A couple other riders passed before we hit some more fire road where I could again use some more "Joel Tempo tm" and pulled a couple of riders back with some big ring action on the flat and rolling sections.

I sifted by myself until we hit Big Chevy and again, not knowing the track came across a huge drop off, I barely had time to consider the merits of Tubular vs Clincher tyres for my wheelchair before I was dropping vertically down the face of it, over I might add a large missing chunk, a quick undie check and a look over my shoulder at the cliff face saw a wee smile appear.

I head a panting from behind, no not the usual Bushlove kind, but I had been caught by someone who sat in for about 10 mins before passing when I monged up a small section, it was one of Wellingtons best and NZ Juniors Rep Tom Bradshaw, what a stormer.

Myself and Tom worked very well together for the next hour or so, hitting up the flat sections, I noted a top speed of 60kph on one occasion, until we came into the recently logged trail with a very slick base to it, I monged around a few times with my well choosen summer race tyres and had a couple of small crashes and lost track of Tom and got caught by another rider which pushed me back to 7th place overall, but importantly 1st Masters by about 13mins which I managed to hold till the finish. The 16yr old and the Dinosaur took out 1st and 2nd, with the World Champion SS Legend Garth in 3rd.

On the way home my lovely wife had booked a bach on Himatangi beach for a couple of days, very lovely,
We made shapes on the beach...




and swung on a swing (Yes the kids did have to queue up for a turn).



A nice ending to a smashing long weekend.

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Lycra Lovers.. Beat em' Join em' or Both???

It was that time of year again when everyone walks around complaining of the cold wet weather and not being able to get out to do any training. WTF, get your woolies on and get out in the cold. My favorite would have to be Tom (Nana Kitted Arm Warmers) Lynsky.

Tom you sure are a unique man, we love ya and your different dress sense.

So about 2 months back Angry Bennett drove the hard word home that we need to get back into some of these lunchtime "Smashfests" we used to have (Nothing like Aldred Manor date night) more like Man on Man Grinding... Errrr Ummmm ok similar to Aldred Manor Date night. I digress, so we started up the lunchtime road rides which are in essences 1hr 30mins of mashing pedals while evil eying the rider next to you. Points were given for King Of The Mountain and Sprint points. The usual suspect would turn up (Angry, Tigs and Joel "Dirty Filthy Roadie") with the odd piece of fresh meat thrown in for the pack ravaging. After the first month we all decided this was once again the way to improve our races, so the ride was back on the weekly calendar.

Which brings me to my first race of the season the Kapiti Road Winter Series Lycra Lovers, Race #3. After a little convincing from fellow Smashfest colleagues I decided to step up to A Grade, putting my own meat on the block as lycra fodder. A perfect day dawned and we set off at a leisurely canter. Thinking if we continued at this pace, Tom's Nana could have knitted a whole rugby team some of those snazzy arm warmers before we crossed the finish line. Lap 1 of three and I was enjoying the odd bit of banter going on at the front of the pack. Lap 2 saw Stu Holtham and Silas Cullen steam off the front never to be seen again, closely followed by Daniel Waluszewski (Which sounds like some Swedish massage maneuver), and the way he rode off the front left the rest of the bunch feeling like we have been Swedish Massaged with a rotary hoe.Lap 3 and I was finally learning the courtesy of riding in a bunch, which included being told to go easy on the braking at the back and to slow down when I hit the front... What The....?!?!?!? I'm confused. Brake but don't brake, right got it...! Feeling strong coming into the last few corners I pulled the brainless Mountain Bike maneuver and ripped off the front, 50mtrs clear I sat their waiting for the sprint to start... and start it did. As the Lycra Vacuum Cleaner started up and sucked me in, I held on as best I could to only get past by 2 other riders, Stoked!!! Not sure what happened to Silas Cullen but I'll take the 5th in A Grade and a big smile on my face.

Was great to catch up with some of the usual suspects Ashley "The Media Whore" Burgess, Kane "Good Cop/Bad Cop" McCollum & Rae Rae "The Huck Legend and Tattoo'd Beauti" Morrison (Down from Jafa Land to burgle C Grade)

Great day out by all, looking forward to the BP Road series in just over a week.

Cheers
Tigs

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Kicking Sand In Your Face

Sandbagging.

From Wikipedia:

Deceiving someone by pretending to be weak.

Sandbagging (racing), a driver deliberately drag races or qualifies slower than what the car can actually perform

Sandbagging (budgeting), a manager deliberately overstates financial requirements with the intent of coming in under-budget, thus being praised.

Sandbagging (golfing), a player deliberately plays poorly until establishing a handicap and then raises his money bets, using the established handicap to unfairly win

Sandbagging (climbing), a climber describes a route as being easier than it actually is

Sandbagging (chess, Go, billiards or other such games), a player who deliberately lowers his competitive rating, in order to play in a future event with a lower rating and consequently have a better chance to win.

Slow play (poker), deceptive play in poker

Sandbagging (fantasy sports), a manager intentionally talks down certain players to trade at a discounted "price".



Basically sandbagging is bullshitting about and downplaying one's ability. In biking it is generally applied to downplaying one's ability prior to a race. Classic sandstorm material might include:

"I've got a cold/flu/std/one lung and I shouldn't really even be here. No result from me today"

"I haven't been doing any riding. I'm too busy with work"

"I've put on heaps of weight and my brakes are dragging. I'll just bring up the rear"


"Save me some view from the top. It'll probably all be gone by the time I get there"

And perennial favourite:

"I'll just be happy with a top 10"

There are many masters of the art of sandbagging practicing around Wellington. And many of them have a camp pink BLR jersey in their wardrobe. Probably the worst offender is Tony Keith.

Its no secret that Tony trains. Hard. Has a coach (albeit a lanky camp roadie one), shaves his legs and can beat a lot of the fellas racing Elite. Tones has, in his youth, actually attended a school for gifted elite athletes.

Tones to Clive earlier today:

"Angry you are now the Top Dawg, Elite is where it is at for you. I'll stick to losing Master 1 this year"

We nearly chocked on the sand and couldn't see for the swirling storm of graininess.

Bennett isn't much of a sandbagger. He posts his (record) time on the Makara Road Hill Climb Board, does sub 4hrs round Taupo and knocked out 230km on Sunday, casually racing at Kapiti in the middle of it.

Yet races M2.

He is getting away with it as he is older than Tigs. Maybe there is an unwritten rule saying that once you are over 40 you can't be peer pressured into racing Elite. Still we can try. Although it will be hard for his kids to see him come away from a race without the customary winner's medal.

So, what will August bring. More epic monthly sandstorms as the boys talk about how badly they will suffer in age grade, only to demolish everyone, then feign disbelief at the result? Or will we see some genuine, hearty, competitiveness. Fighting for position in the top grade? We'll see!

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Wainui Six - Trip' Flip - Pool Fool - Wet The Bed

Thanks Jono Baddiley for most viewed pic on Facebook

Thanks Jordan Moss for great pic!

A couple of weeks ago I had the sweet annual pleasure of beasting myself on the Wainuiomata tracks for 6 hours. It was the second running of the Wainui 6 Hour Wurldz and was once again a splendid day out on magnificent trails and ran safely and like clockwork thanks to the wonderful event team, especially Paula, Geoff & Riley Acethorp, Shane Wetzl and all the cool cats of the Wainui Trail Project.

We had a few Bushies in the mix. Ashley was riding in the intensely spectated, "Ladies Who Lunch" with Revolvers, Leigh, MJ and Amanda 'Bicycle' Jenkins. Fastest Man was riding with big brother Al, as the Santa Cruz Syndicate. Sammo was soloing on a singlespeed. His first ever ride on a singlespeed!! I was on one cog too, as otherwise I get lazy in long races and granny around.

Thanks Jono Baddiley for pic

I won't go on or long about the race as I need to get to more important matters.

I aired up an old tire the night before so naturally it was leaking. I pumped it up using Ben Murphy's attractive Lezyne pump on the start line with 2 minutes to go. But the screw on adaptor removed my valve core upon removal. Stink. The gravity of a flat tire with 40secs to go was not lost on anyone and no-one really took the piss! I got a track pump and aired it up quickly. With ten secs to go I was back on the line. But when the gun went I was so emotionally exhausted I just dropped back and rode up the track in about 300th place.

Thanks Pete Marshall for pic

I stopped after a couple of laps to put a tube in a swap my cowboy hatmet for my new fancy Bell Variant. The cowboy hat was flapping in front of my eyes whenever I shravled the gnar. Other than that my race was the usual mix of joy, purgatory and day dreams. For once I didn't crash. I loved Snail Trail and Beeline on al my laps. Great trails, and you get smoother and smoother until at about 4 hours or so you get sloppier and sloppier! I also enjoyed hitting the step-up jump at the marqueee every lap. The Lynskinator followed me over it without realising what he was doing once. Great way to nail your first jump, blindfolded.

Thanks Jono Baddiley for pic illustrating my suffering

I was really out of condition so couldn't hope to hold on to the fast boys, but had a great ride and was fortunate enough to sneak 3rd SS behind epic rigid restroom raider Beardie Sharpe, Nearly Sharrat and a few mins ahead of the Lynskinator.

Thanks Jordan Moss for pic of random Coronation St extra

Sammo did a magnificent ride on his first SS outing. Everyone was gobsmacked that it was his first time on it. Several hours in I passed him on Jungles and he was still out of the saddle chewing the bars like a seasoned SS pro. Rigid too.

Thanks Jono Baddiley for pic

It was a great race. It was so cool to see so many friendly faces and great costumes, particularly Sifter and Simon as Little John and Robin Hood, Paul's BA Baracus, the Chips Cops and of course the delectable Ladies Who Lunch (in the PM ;o).

But in other news:

This week a keen kiwi lad called Jed Middleton made the world's first ever triple backflip. The video must have been played so many times around the world. It beggars belief. The lad must have stones like church bells.



But that wasn't the only physical feat of enormous prestige completed recently. In the bizarre world of shallow diving, a new record was set at 11m drop into a 30cm deep paddling pool. Yes. 11m and 30cm.

This chap did hold the record. His record setter in this video is magnificent. But I can't help but notice how he appears to be less than confident and even enters the small amount of water with poor form, bending a leg.



Enter Leonidas Of Sparta, reincarnated as a mad American professor, who whilst in Norway nails the same, but from 11m. Perfect form, outrageous, victory battle cry. Fabulous. That is how it is done. Celebrate your victories like you mean it.

This will be the new planking, mark my words.



And to conclude this evenings rambling; My lovely wife recently 'purchased from the internet' the new album by that Chris Brown. The sub-man who gave Rihanna a piece of his temper. The little worm has a song called "Wet The Bed". Now I am unsure if this is supposed to be a joke or some sort of parody, but the lyrics are out of this world. Are these the kind of songs our youth are getting down to? This presentation of his non-Spartan credentials seems to suggest that this is indeed a serious song. Brilliant. What a worm.



Person most likely to cry with laughter watching this - Trudi Bennett.
Person most likely to sing this to his wife on date night - Tony Keith.
Person least likely to ever sing this, ever - Manly John Randal.
Person most likely to sing this song to John Randal - Oli Brooke White.


"I'm gonna make you drip, drip, drip...."

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Mt Isobel Challenge

After months of inactivity I was in desperate need of a hit out before winter. With not much happening on the mountain bike front I had to widen the search to a bit of multisport. With my bike skills and a love of rainbow thermals it's a natural fit. After all Bushlovers are always keen to try new things although unlike Davo I decided to pick running over nipple clamps and lead acid batteries.

So Mt Isobel challenge it was. Put on by the good folks at Hanmer events it was sure to be good. It involved a short canter up Mt Isobel then a bike to try claw back the inevitable humiliation. The run was only 8.6km so how hard could it be? Looking at the topography bloody hard was the answer as it climbed to 1316m in under 6km. I hadn't touched my running shoes in a year and wasn't even sure they were worn in as I can count the times I've used them on one hand. The bike on the other hand looked a cakewalk with 24km of gravel road with lots of downhill but almost no climbing.

Being well and truly sick of the study I should be doing we busted up to Hanmer after work on Friday to make a weekend of it. Carbo loaded with a few curries then an early night. It can be a little nippy this time of year so I was glad the morning was pretty mild with no frost and not a sign of snow on the mountain. Dropping my bike up to the transition pre race it was pretty windy at Jacks pass but otherwise conditions were ideal.

Lining up on the start line I had no idea how fast to go. I had a few km of road to sort myself out then it was on to the climb proper. This is when the pain began...

At first the track was runnable but as it progressed (and I became more knackered) a quick walk was the best I could manage at times. Some bits were proper steep requiring a little climbing on all fours. Looking at my watch I'd been going 20min and I had never been in such pain. Maybe I'm doing it wrong but I've never been in such a state on a bike. Running is proper hard.

To counter the pain was some fabulous views over the Huranui. As I continued to climb the track changed from native bush to sub alpine tussock to barren scree.

After nearly an hour (or to be precise 56:18) the summit finally came. I was too tired to celebrate it in bushlove fashion. (and wasn't wearing incredibly gay shorts and an action man survival belt)

If I thought running up was hard running down proved to be even worse. Within 10m I'd turned my ankle and soon was suffering from some nasty stitch. In the space of 2km and a drop of nearly 500m I'd managed to fall a number of times and lose over 4 min on the leaders. Downhill runnings a skill I sorely lack.

I was well stoked to reach transition at all. In the time it takes most people to get ready in the morning I was off on my bike. I knew I would have to push hard to save some face so put it in the big ring and got to work. While 24km long the bike was all gravel road with almost no climbing so there was little chance to impress. In the end I reeled in 14 people and put in a semi respectable 5th place for the ride in 1:01:09

So 14th overall and 9th in open men in a time of 2:14:41. Would have been nice to have been able to trim a minute or so off to get up in 5th but my run and in particular the downhill was to big a deficit to recover from. It was really good to give something different a crack rather than the usual xc jeyboi action. While I don't think I'll trade the lycra for rainbow polypros anytime soon you might see me lining up for the occasional race. The St James Challange in particular looks good.

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The Accounts for the year ended 31 March 2011

Accounts for the year ended 31 March 2011

The auditors have been through and are happy to sign the accounts off containing the following result.

Income: Minta
Expenses: Meh
Profit for the year: Winning
Tax: Dodged
Net profit after Tax: Charlie Sheen.

The Team found a great income opportunity in FY11 with the leasing out of Slackmeister to the Monster energy DH Team. In exchange for a paltry $9,990 (excl GST) per event, Monster gets a racer who has extensive palmares including the Masters Games XC and DH titles and performs botty grinders upon request.

Monster also benefit from his exceptional wrenching skills at a gift of a rate of $4,990 (excl GST) per day. Their gain is Wellington’s loss as Slackshanks is the go-to guy for a lot of riders. But screw them, as the yield on our arrangements is gigantic as we only pay Slacky enough to keep him in Family Buckets of the Colonel’s finest and a small selection of the more risqué naturist website subscriptions he holds.

Slackattack did brilliantly in the FY11 racing season and is in line for a portion of the $49,990 (excl GST) performance bonus we wrote into his Monster contracts.
Granted it is a pretty shit and demeaning portion, at a venomously insulting $19.00 (excl GST), but it gets him another bucket and a couple of hours sniffing around the pension-drawing lasses on his favourite sites. But all revenues go into the Team’s bullion dealing account and everyone in the team benefits after Clive has drawn his 70% management fee and the other team members (excl those on Monster secondments) have deducted their various administrative fees to the tune of 29.98%.

Another valuable line of revenue has been in Kah’s product endorsements. We are reaping a splendid $8.75HKD for every frame sold in Australasia.



Via the BLR wholly owned subsidiary, “Nick_K Looks Like Harry Potter NZ Ltd”, a total of $35,350.00 (excl GST) was received from hapless wand-waving look-a-like appearances at children’s parties, themed civil unions and the Armageddon festival in Wellington. All feedback suggests the $353.50 per appearance is cheap considering the incredible likeness and the commitment with which Kennedy does his Quiddich routine and flirts provocatively with any Ron Weasley types attending the event. So a lift to $375 per gig doesn’t seem out of the question.


Harry caught napping whilst eating at a Mexican Potter themed civil union in Feb.
Although too late to include in the FY11 accounts, the Team will also realize considerable revenue from Tony’s appearances as Tony the Tiger at key events like Singlespeed races, team relays and bar mitzvahs.





Kellogg’s are coming to the party with a valuable 199GBP per appearance, which we are taking in multiple sets of $11.99NZD disc brake pads ex CRC so we duck GST on import. Kosher.



Extensive media whoring is adding to the bottom line. Ashley even got on the TV. Wonny Jaghorn and Hundy Bennett made appearances in global publications like the Wellingtonian and Hutt News and Davo found himself on the cover of NZMTBR, although this proved to be an expense due to the bottomless coffee tab provided to Mr Patton in exchange.



The blog is trying to capture as many cool kiwi rider blogs as we can find and this will prove to be a valuable income stream once we start invoicing their owners. We reckon a good completely fair scheme is to charge based on the number of posts they do and will therefore be indicative of their position in the blogroll, driving traffic. So Oli can expect to have his accounts hit hard. Hiskey’s invoice will probably just get lost in number rounding. If we are missing any cool blog, especially from Wellingtonians, please let us know on workbanterATbushloveracing.com.

Cheers
Leonidas - Press Sec.

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The Wainui 6hr Wurldz - Miss it at your peril! - 22nd May

It is just over two weeks till the Wainui 6hr Wurldz race in the minta Wainuiomata Trail Park.

Rise from the couch, cast down your boyish computer game handle thing, log out from the Farcebook, throw back a glass of skim milk, pull on your bonedome and roll out.

Feel the potential in your shanks. Effortlessly stomping the inclines. You are a Trail God! Carve those corners. Fly that drop. The world slows down as you manual long through the puddle.

Endo turn 180 and roll backwards into the garage. Toss helmet across garage. It does a Bond onto the hatstand. Yes, you have a hatstand.

Throw your glory splattered garments into the machine and surf to www.bicycle.co.nz and enter the Wainui 6hr Wurldz. Do it now. The entries close on Thursday 19 May and entries are limited. There are not many left. Last year it sold out. Do it.



Get a buddy and race the duo. Or entice more buddies and race a four buddy posse. Or come and have a go if you think you’re hard enough, and go solo. Eat some nails – go solo singlespeed.



The Wainui 6hr Wurldz has a great vibe and is not to be missed. It’s low cost ($25-35) with loads of spot prizes, including some from local legends Floe and Bicycle. You ride some of the region’s best trails with some great people. There is even a $100 cash prize for best costume. So don’t be shy. Sometimes less is more – last year Lynsky would have won it with his pasty birthday suit.

You might not be used to riding for so long, but fear not. The excellent trails built by the fantastic supporters of the Wainuiomata Trail Park (www.wtp.org.nz) , such as Snail Trail, with its swooping, pumpy, radness and Beeline, with its character building challenges (the significant of which have ‘chicken routes’) will keep you entertained. And a little extra motivation can always be found on course, regardless of your persuasion.





Now you have entered online, boil the jug for a coffee and knock out a few press-ups. Press-ups make all the difference. I can now do ten in a row (on my knees). The best training you can do with two weeks to go is Jedi mind training. Imagine how you are going to feel during the event, imagine the challenges and how you will deal with them. Lots of carefully planned physical training can come undone if the day throws a few challenges your way you were not prepared for. Do a Hendrix; chop the mountain down with the edge of your hand.



See you there Trail Gods!

The Sheriff Of Bushlove County

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Hogsback express

I've been keen to czech out the new Castlehill tracks for sometime but due to the evils of the FRACP have only just got round to it this weekend. For those not in the know the Hogsback track is a brilliant new project by the residents of the tiny town of Castlehill. Over the last year they've built around ten km of track linking the town to Dracophyllum flat then onto the classic Craigieburn loop. This gives the possibility of a 40-50km loop of prime Canterbury's subalpine riding.

Chch was grim and dreary but by the time I had got to the Craigburn valley (via an epic steak and cheese pie in Sheffield) it was a cracking day. Its one of my favourite bits of Canterbury with some great riding, epic vistas and 5 ski fields. If was planning on hanging around I'd love to build a place up there. Due to a lack of time and probably fitness I only had time to squeeze in the Hogback and Dracophyllum flat so will have to leave the full loop for another day. Was great to out on the bike before winter sets in proper.

I won't faff on anymore so here's some pics.

A huge thanks is owed to everyone who's been involved in the project. I think they're created an iconic bit of track which is a real sampler of the best riding Canterbury has to offer. It's got great views, tussock land, beech forest, a bit of climbing, some fun downhills all in a package easily assessable to anyone with a bike and a little fitness.

Link here: http://www.castlehill.net.nz/castlehill/mtb/hogsback_mtb.htm for more information and how to get involved.

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The Genderpretender & the Handjob

A while back I got my grubby hands on a beautiful Ibis Mojo. My Mojo really opened up my riding and allowed me to get into much more trouble than I had previously been able to on hardtails. Everything just got easy. I became both an Ibis and a carbon fan.

But I still love hardtails. Singlespeed ones especially. The lustiest I’d ever lusted after was Tim ‘Adonis’ Wildman’s Ibis Tranny which he’d won the SS Nats on. When he gave me the whisper that it was looking for a new owner, I sold everything that wasn’t nailed down at Aldred Mansions and grabbed it. After buying the Mojo it was tough to find things that were not nailed down which could be sold. The two highest value items in the house had heartbeats and I didn’t think I could get away with that, but I got there in the end.

The Tranny is Ibis’ hardtail/singlespeed/travel bike. I’ll probably never use the travel bike feature, which is where the back end comes off to enable fitting into a normal suitcase. But the singlespeed functionality I use pretty much all the time. There is a joint acting as a pivot below the seat collar on the seatstay. Then behind the bottom bracket there is a “Slot Machine” which is where the action happens. You loosen one bolt, gently push down on the bike, which extends the chainstays via the Slot Machine. Check chain tension. Tighten bolt. By far the easiest SS tensioning I’ve come across. Totally creak free too and no loosening.



The frame is awesome. Big fat carbon tubes and smooth lines, a lot like the Mojo. It has neat removable cable stops to clean it up when not running gears and the SS dropout (which I am yet to get) has a bottle opener, because we all know from the plethora of bottle openers on SS bikes, that all SS riders take glass beer bottles into the hills and crack them open on their bikes.

I built it up with a shortish stem for an ‘XC’ bike – a 70mm Thomson, and it keeps the steering nice and nippy and is great on the steep stuff. Its got a nice wide Sunline flat bar too. I think hardtails look more business-like with flat bars. Its got some Hope hubs with Flows. People scoffed at my heavy rims, but I wanted bomber strong and uber stiff wheels which could jump and get thrown about a bit. The Flows are not heavy anyway. They just look heavy next to very light Stans rims like Crests and wotnot. I am not even allowed on some of the lad's wheels as I weigh over 80kg. That is just wrong.

She/he has a straight 2:1 gear. Its is sometimes a little tall around Wellington, but making it easier would mean tossing in a man card and I don’t want to do that. So it’s a strong build, not a weight weenie build, although the light frame would certainly enable a low weight build if it was my thing.





I banged some gears on it the other day for the Porirua Grand Traverse and it was the fastest bike I’ve ever raced. Although the only other decent hardtail I’ve raced was a 1999 S-Works, so things have come quite a way! I looked forward to taking the gears off though to reveal its true beauty again. Although no sooner than I did so, Boner Toner whisked it off to Keith Manor, put stripes on it and raced it at the SS Nats in Napier. Tones got a fine 5th place which was fantastic.
Credit - BluedogSS Facebook. Thanks

She/he is a mint ride. Its hard to say if She/he is my favourite over the Mojo. It depends on the day. I love how stiff the Tranny is when giving it the beans. I stamp and she goes and goes.

Is owning two Ibis bikes enough? Haha, I lol at you – of course it is not enough. So what is it I want now? An HD? The new SL-R? Maybe a Hakkaluggi for the Crosstafarian's Wellington CX series?

No. I want Simon Kennett’s early 90’s Ibis steel tandem.

Simon and I ended up on the same initiative/workshop the other day around the relationship between buses and cyclists in Wellington. The wily, wiry fellow bought along an extremely rare Ibis tandem. I made my starting bid at an insulting $500, hoping maybe Simon didn’t actually know anything about bikes. But it turned out that Simon has some knowledge of these maters and he lolled at my offer. By the end of the session I had upped my offer to about $1,500 for this ancient iron horse, but he was still not budging.






If I come into any money I will be straight round to Kennett Mansions with my next offer. I need that bike and it needs a good restoration and Simon is too much of a hippy to do it. He would probably cover it with something sustainable like hemp paste and bits of vegetable.

Just look at the wonderful handjob. Snakes alive – it is too marvellous to even bear witness to without weeping.

After all this lyrical waxing you could be mistaken for thinking I was sponsored by Ibis or something. But alas no. Ibis (and Santa Cruz) bikes are bought into NZ by Mike at Hyperformance Hardware, and he mostly supports athletes rather than Whopper scoffing, chubby weekend warriors. Mike is an excellent ambassador for his brands and has been brilliant at dishing out all the right advice to me on many occasions. Thanks, Mike!

See you on the trails (every few weeks when I get a chance).

Cheers
Dave

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