Civil Defence - Queenstown Emergency

CIVIL DEFENCE EMERGENCY - SEND IN THE BUSHLOVE FIRST RESPONDERS

We heard that for some reason linked to heavy rains in Queenstown, that they are looking for any help they can get with the task of Sandbagging.

To aid the locals we are sending our best to do what they can for the community.

Naturally our mercy mission sandbaggers will ride there, despite never actually doing any riding. We are dispatching Tony Keith and Dave Sharpe for starters. They will leave on the bikes tonight from Wellington and are really unfit and chubby. They'll be there for morning tea tomorrow on the shores of Wakatipu.

Once they've pushed back a muffin and a couple of Gary Colemans, they'll begin telling locals how they might race Rec Men this year and how they've done no training for months.
A NZ Airforce heli gets into trouble in the sand cloud sent up as the Bushies head south


The locals can expect a great deal from these boys. But if even they fail to bag enough sand, we'll call in the big guns and arrange for Jase Goldie and Nick Kennedy to sift down.

And if even he doesn't sandbag sufficiently to solve whatever problem Queenstown has, well let Carl Patton know. He'll fix it in minutes.

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SS nationals - Queenstown

Just like all the best things in life the singlespeeds had moved South for the year. While not as big a field as Rotorua the previous two years a top field had lined up with Ex national champions, Olympians, Kiwi brevet winners, a seedy guy called Garth, hairy men in dresses, fairies, members of the village people and a fearsome looking bumblebee. Unlike these collections of freaks I maintained the bushlove flare for style with a subtle sophistication in a hot pink sequined skinsuit.

Not just being content with looking stylish the skinsuit also served the dual purpose of aerodynamics. Extensive testing at the bushlove high performance lab revealed a 1.6W/Min/m/kg advantage over a nurses outfit and fishnets. This was an advantage I'd need every bit of.

You see back in the day I was a proper singlespeeder. For the better part of 3 years I pretty much rode only singlespeeds no matter how inappropriate the ride. For much of the time I didn't even own a geared bike (although at one time still had 5 bikes) and never really missed them. The reason I got into singlespeeding was pretty simple, I hated cleaning my bike, but once its sucked you into its hard to go back. This all changed last year when I snapped my frame leaving me without a ss for a few months. Since then I haven't ridden a ss so had no idea how this race would go.

As with all singlespeed races a zany start was required so we lined up for a 500m run with our front wheels. Unlike some of the other Bushlovers I'm no Bi-athlete so was quickly dropped off the line by Garth and was well stuffed by the time I got back to my bike. After fumbling to get my wheel back on I was off.
The Queenstown mtb club had put on a phenomenal course for the race based at 7 mile delta. For those who haven't ridden the tracks I'll just say they are awesome and you should go ride them now. With 100% singletrack with a total of 10m of flat track it certainly was a riders course. Having never ridden the tracks before, I quickly found was massively overgeared, oh well I'm used to rocking more (gear) inches than most.

Back to the race a local Jimmy had got off to a flier getting a break on the field from the start. Garth, Andy Reid, Marcus Roy and myself formed the chasing pack and rode together for the first 3/4 of a lap till Garth showed his class and broke away. I kept riding with the remaining two till the first beer stop where they kept going while I stopped for my first beer of the day.
Up to this stage I was riding like a mong, running pinches and generally lacking any kind of ss class. Some stage on lap 2 though, my moment of zen occurred and I flicked back to ss mode remembering all the little tips to being a singlespeeder.

Sadly on lap 2 Andy who I'd been having a great race with had an epic spill breaking his collarbone and loosing a boob from his fetching netball dress in the process. Hopefully he's recovering well and didn't get too many strange looks at the local hospital.

I ended up riding the rest of the race solo and loved every minute of it. Jimmy was always just ahead of me but I could never close the gap. I could quite happily have kept lapping them out all afternoon as the course was that good. Showboating across the line I was pretty happy with my third place. Congratulations to Garth who is in amazing form at the moment riding better than I've ever seen. I'm expecting big things of him at the worlds.

Big thanks to the Queenstown mtb club for putting on an awesome race, all the racers and the Queenstown weather which held off from the torrential downpour of the rest of the weekend for the race.

Next race is the Cycle Surgery singletrack fiesta. I hope to see you all there (and I promise I won't wear my skinsuit)

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Bushlove discusses the moonride

Disclaimer: Whilst the Bushlove Racing Team does endorse both silly cheap laughs and complex comedy, it does in no way support the Nazi Party, or any associated groups.

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Mind The Gap - Grom in Training

Nothing to do with this post, but its been a while since we saw the pic of a liquored-up Tiger Keith, looking like Freddie Mercury.

After a great morning with my daughter, Ella, at the Revolve Willy-Free XC race series, I popped out for a sift around the locality.

I visited the Tawa jump track by the railway station. Was my third trip there. I've been trying to lift my riding a notch, as for years I have just ridden regular XC stuff. I've got a lush Ibis Carbon Mojo now. It really is the swiss army knife of bikes. I've been able to do a couple of XC races and not come last, in addition to getting the confidence to get into more threatening riding than before. Almost beyond XC!



I managed a couple of the quite small doubles which was great. Rob Willis, a very competent local chap, gave me lots of advice and a few demonstrations on how to do some bigger stuff. He sold me the 10ft gap jump into the main berm, much like a used car salesman would sell someone a car which they could hardly afford, and with far more power than they could cope with. I had a few run ins to check my speed, as Rob suggested, then gave it a crack, heart in mouth style, as Rob and a couple of the young fellas watched on (probably baying for XC blood).

After falling of once as I went too slow, then a couple of attempts where I cased the lip and nose wheelied down the other side a bit, I finally popped a few more psi in my fake freerider ball-bag, and gave it more juice. Just about got it. Felt awesome. A real tick on my route to becoming a proper grom.

Thanks to Rob for his help and advice. Now when they start putting big gaps in XC courses, i'll be dishing out the good news to my skinny, shaved friends.

Cheers
Dave

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Can't stop, Hanmer time!

First up sorry for the terrible terrible pun, its almost as bad as the infamous redrocks blown seal joke.

I've always been a big fan of racing of induro racing in Hanmer so as always was looking forward to it. Thinking way back to 2005 it was one of my first races in a mixed team with the foxy Daydreamer. I don't want to spread gossip so all I will say is we were young, impressionable, it was cold and the tent we had was small. It was also my first solo 12 hr back in 2006 and possibly the coldest, wettest 6hr in 2008.

Back to the future, the race has been taken over by the Hanmer mtb club and they had put on a great course that could be enjoyed by all. While there was nothing technical it still had enough in it to keep it interesting for more experienced riders. Being the unorganised punter I am at the last minute I realised my bike was virtually un-rideable so I owe a big thanks to Dr Bike for sorting the Titus out. With f all notice he serviced my forks, tuned my gears, rebuilt my rear hub and dealt to a severe case of nipple failure (which up until now I thought only happened to Slacky at Karapoti).

The day dawned frosty and cold. We were glad for our warm cabin complete with fire and I'm sure we had a much warmer night than the hardy people who had camped overnight onsite. We set up camp next to Tinkerbell's tent mansion and Mrs K was glad the sun was shining after our last cold and shelterless experience in Hanmer. Was great to see that Bushlove's reputation is spreading in the South, Tinkerbell even referred to me in her blog as "one of the legendary racers of the mighty Bushlove Racing Team"

With the 4 and 8 hr starting together the pace was hot from the start especially from the in form Jeremy Inglis who was riding the solo short course. There was no way I was keeping up with him so after the first lap I settled into having a good battle with Andy Reid on his Stigmata cross bike. It was good fun doing my best keeping up with him on the flat faster sections while trying to drop him on the downhills. It must have been pretty brutal going though, as after 5-6 laps he had to change to a bike with suspension.
I felt like I was riding well at this stage opening up a handy lead of at least a few minutes. By lap 10 it had all started to unravel (I even got stung by a bee!) and my lead had nearly disappeared. Not being used to riding more than 20 minutes at a time my back started killing me although some painkillers (sans vodka as I'm no singlespeeder) courtesy of Ryda and Jude helped.

By lap 11 Oli easily passed me and rode off. Once the painkillers kicked in I started to feel much improved and really enjoyed the last few laps. In the end I finished 2nd a few minutes behind Oli but a lap up on 3rd.

Overall it was a well run race and great value too. It was a very good idea have it based out of the Forest Camp again (a location much better for spectators) - I did miss Pizzacarto though.

Thanks to Sarah for being race coordinator extraordinaire. She did a great job organising all the details, feeding me and generally being winsome. Thanks also to Craig, Rebakah and all the Singletrack Christchurch crew making the day so enjoyable.

Post race the Titus returned to its always intended singlespeed state for my next race. All going well I even hope to have a special treat for the throngs of bushlove fans.

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Any Given Saturday - Bushlove Leave Pass Rampage

After getting a mammoth leave pass to hit the trails yesterday, I'm feeling a little jaded. Today's physical activities will be no more extravagant than a trip to the new playpark and maybe a swim. When I say 'swim', I am referring to the time I will spend lying in the shallows at Porirua pool with my groin over a pleasant warm water jet, whilst my 4yr old, Ella and her friend go down the small slide 500 times.


(MC Hammer soundtrack removed as it was sometimes being blocked for copyright! Doh.)


Last weekend Ashley & Marjolein held the first round of the Revolve Womens MTB Series. It was a great success and Willy-Free Racing proved to be very popular with 51 lovely ladies competing at the inaugural event. The awesome Karapoti race got 143 ladies in its 25th anniversary year by my count, which makes the 51 in attendance look very impressive. I'm looking forward to joining some other Bushlove pro-marshals at the second round at Makara next Sunday (25 April) to see some more oestrogen fuelled trail rampage.

Yesterday morning Mr Sharpe was delivered to my doorstep by his lovely smokescreen, Keryn. We were riding over the 'Best Of Belmont' and over to meet chums for even more guffaw-packed trail riding.

On the way we took in Chopper and Big Weta. Choppers has the start of its winter grease now, as we found out when our front tires went straight across the first corner and not around it. With Mono's encouragement, I nailed the techy right hand rock drop at Baked Beans Bend. Although did wish the rock was drier and I was better at mountain cycling as I began the drop, it went well. I'd always wanted to tick that off.

We met up at the new Miramar Trails, lovingly crafted by Slacky, Ben Wilde and many others. Thanks all. Good job. We had an awesome time riding Jail Break, the dh track. It is a sensational bit of trail. I can see me promoting more family trips to the inlaws who live nearby. I enjoyed cutting Slacky's lunch by hooning a drop and caught him of guard as he whined about being on an XC race bike with slick tires.

We headed over to Aro Valley for a coffee (which I have just remembered I didn't text Ashley and Dan about. Soz guys!). After some banter with epic mountainbike legend Carl James Patton we rode new Aro/Polhil tracks. I think it was Transient and Highbury Fling. Great tracks and a credit to the trail masters who built them.

I still had to ride home to Porirua and was running on an empty tank. Monochops rode up Ngaio Gorge with me before we farewell and I moseyed off home. Up Ngaio Gorge, Mono still looked like an idling, curb-crawling Lamborghini. In that he had a huge amount of horsepower in reserve, but also looked a little sleazy. I stopped at the Tawa Jump Track to do a few lame XC rider jumps with the locals. They were entertained by my plastic bike, but not my puny airs.

Davo.

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The Crazyman WOF for 2010

This was a simple outing with the idea to give ourselves a bit of a warrant of fitness before Crazyman 2010. Originally we were going to recreate as much of the course as possible and do a run/bike but for various reasons I will not go into, this was canned.

We did the full crazyman run in about 1.30. Timing was difficult due to the banter breaks, and waiting for Davo to finish showing us how to do pushups.

And how not to.....

Marco was inspiring in his usual running kit.

Jo took out the downhill section, no picture of this as there was absolutely no way of catching her. However pictures of Davo and Marco are available.

Jo showed her usual determination to reach the top first.

And Davo.... musing on perhaps accepting a ride to the event next time rather than going over belmont to begin with!

The full team of Marco, Davo, Sharpie and Jo (I am missing from the picture due to a lack of a long arm) at the top of the hill.

Marco chose this moment to get a head start on everyone leaving us looking silly before bolting after him.

A nice outing with full marks to everyone else who rode out to the nui to then do the 18km trail run. Also full credit to the godfather who decided to run the last road section in bare feet.

Some nice video action interviews happened. Although this is the only one that has "family" content.

And a small amount of house keeping....

Jo I have your drink bottle and orange

Godfather I have your drink bottle

Davo I have your pottle of vasaline...

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Makara Peak Grand Loop Challenge - post match analysis!

Well it was shaping up as a big night, and it certainly delivered! So instead of rambling on about it, here's a few pictures...

Davo gives the race briefing

...some people will come up with any excuse to get out of riding...


We had the young (Hannah and Jonathan Barnes get ready to start)

...and we had the old (Marco turns 100 this year)

...some people brought a friend along for the ride

The first rider is off... Tom Bradshaw obviously doesn't do lycra!

But the hot favourite pushed it a bit too hard for the win!

Last year's winner Edwin Crossling also got a bit carried away with his mad jumps!

Richard Leacock showed everyone how to ride downhill fast (and stay upright) recorded the fastest downhill split

Some people looked for more unusual ways to go fast!

From the summit, it was all downhill to the finish...


The fastest man round the circuit was Gav McCarthy

Fastest women (and winner of the golden bunny and a kiss from Kah) was Ashley Burgess

But the biggest award of the night, the "Clive Bennett Top 27" award, went to Rachel Ockelford

A huge thank you has to go to all the volunteers who made this event possible. People like our tail end charlie (and keen follower of fashion) Tom Lyndskey make these events happen!


We had nearly 40 riders and raised $180 that will go to the Makara Peak Supporters to keep the park and trails looking good.
We will be back with more fun races later in the year, but there is plenty to keep you entertained in the coming months:

Shane Wetzel (who with Jude Young were up at the Makara summit recorded splits so we could calculate the descent times) is running a 6, 12 and 24 hour race in May out at the Wainuiomata Trail Park
Wainuiomata Winter Weekender

Also for the ladies there is the Revolve Mountain bike series
Revolve Women's Mountain Bike Series

And if you liked these photos, there are plenty more:
Bushlove Grand Loop Challenge Gallery

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The Screaming-O XC Race - "Oooo Ahhhh Oooo Argghhh!"

Davo and Al rode the Screaming-O in the Oronorongo's East of Wellington at the weekend. Here are their tales:

Dave's Tale

When my wife heard I was going for the Screaming-O on Sunday, her eyes lit up like they used to when we were courting.

Her expression changed somewhat when I explained the riding I was planning, was down the Orongorongo Valley and had nothing to do with 'quality time'. My date for the day was Al 'Mailman' Crossling.

The weather started out a little miserable but cleared through a bit for the race which was a bonus. We steamed off the line and I felt boxed immediately. But I persevered as I knew if I went into the woods with Gav McCarthy, I could maybe stay with him till the river. Gav moved away about halfway along Orongorongo track though and I couldn't reel him back in. Awesome riding on the Orongorongo Track. I could see him pretty clearly on the river bed and reeled him in a little, but once we hit the 4WD climbs I didn't stand a chance against 'the climbing specialist'!

I had a great time flogging myself across the excellent course, especially the river crossings and the rocky feeder streams. I was finally riding a modern bike too - a carbon Ibis Mojo. It was fantastic to ride on the rough stuff. It was even faster than my rigid singlespeed. Who'd have guessed? I was able to steam through the rough stuff with a far more 'cavalier' attitude than usual. I must be careful my singlespeed doesn't get too jealous.

I spent a lot of time searching over my shoulder for my key dangermen, Mailman and Mr Patton. But they must have all had their brake pads rubbing, went for a swim, caught some fish or something, as I had a bit of a gap. I got in 3.5mins behind Gav which I was stoked with. I got some uber-win scorched choccy almonds which made for an effective week of bribes to my daughter.

Al's first Screaming-O

The last time I went out to the Catchpool Valley was on a primary school trip. But given my class trip involved what seemed like an endless day of walking when we all would have rather gone for a swim, I wanted to get back on good terms with the Orongorongo forest.

So without a bus load of screaming kids and cranky teachers, it was off to the Catchpool Valley for a ride through the Orongorongo Valley on one of the few days you can ride a bike in the area. Davo and I were representing Bushlove in the Screaming O. While I did not have all my primary classmates with me, I was still in for a bit a lesson.

Off the line, I shot straight to the front of the class. Unfortunately I had not been doing my homework in the last few weeks (broken ribs, too many pies...) and was immediately schooled in riding up a hill by Big Gav and Davo. Yes, Davo rode away from me on a hill.

But this was one lesson I was beginning to really enjoy. The Orongorongo Track is simply amazing! In the damp conditions we had it was some of the most enjoyable riding I have ever done. So while my legs were only just passing with a "C" grade, I had an "A+" grin.

At the end of the Oronogorongo Track we crossed Turere Bridge and headed down the Orongorongo River bed heading back out to the coast. Riding down the river valley, crossing the river a few times. Carl Patton closed the gap to me and I chased him over the next few kms of 4WD along the valley side. Where the river meets the coast we turned back onto the road and headed North to the Catchpool Valley. It was here that I could hide the fact that my legs weren't paying attention in class.

In the end I was passed by one more rider in the home straight, but to be honest none of that mattered. This was what mountain biking was all about, a course that is truly spectacular. It will be great if we could ride in the Orongorongo area more often or explore some of the other areas of the park, but unfortunately we're not that spoilt (yet?).

This is a brilliant event that if you own a mountain bike you should not miss. I can't wait till the next opportunity to ride in this area. Hopefully my legs pay attention in class next time.

Legs = F
Riding in the Orongorongo area = A+
Screaming O = A++ (top of the class!)


Another fabulous outing.

1st Gavin McCarthy
2nd Dave Aldred
3rd Carl Patton
4th Chris Stark
5th Al Crossling

From both of us - Big thanks to Shane & Jill Ross, the marshals and all the other bikers for coming out and helping to make it such a great day out.

Thanks for reading. Cheers.
Dave & Al.

PS - The Orongorongo Tracks and River area is off limits to bikes but for this one event each year. Please respect this as any riders on the track risk the continuation of this event and damaging the reputation of the rest of us. Thanks folks!

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Bushloves Newest Family Member - Logan James Keith (Tiger Cub)

Logan James Keith was born on Sat 13th March 2010 9:11am 8lbs 8oz. Mum & healthy baby boy are feeding and drinking well. A big thanks to the Bushlove Family (wonderful partners included) for the presents and well wishes. Special mention to Nick K & Sarah K for the extras for Logan (Love the Tiger paws). Big Sister Tyler loves her BLR top, even wanted to sleep in it that night.

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Calling All Females! - Racing Just For You In Wellington!

Yo Girls, Ladies, Women and Smokescreens!

Ashley & Marjolein are organising a Revolve Womens Mountain Bike Series this Autumn.

No willys allowed. Although we hear there may be a few willys marshaling and helping out ;o)

Something for everyone (as long as you do not have a willy) with the "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" and "Queen of the Mountains" classes. Estrogen Rampage Overload!

It's another great value fun series of events for Wellington. Spread the word!

Sunday 10 April Mount Victoria
Sunday 25 April Makara Peak
Sunday 16 May Wainuiomata

For further details and entry forms go to the Revolve website here and throw your support behind this great new Wellington MTB calendar highlight!


Leonidas - BLR Press Sec.

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2010 Makara Peak Grand Loop Challenge

It may be April Fools Day, but the only fool will be you if you miss this race!

Bushlove Racing is proud to present the 2010 Makara Peak Grand Loop Challenge
Race starts Thursday 6pm 1st April, Makara Peak Carpark (it's the day before Good Friday, so it's technically not a school night)
Entry $5 (all entry fees donated to the Makara Peak Supporters)


Pre-register by email or enter on the night. If entering by email, include your name (doh!) and Karapoti time (for seeding). If entering on the day, please be at the carpark by 5:45pm.

The course is the usual “grand loop”
Start Makara Peak Carpark – Koru, Sally Alley, Missing Link, Aratahi, Ridgeline, Ridgeline Extension, Swigg and Starfish – finish Makara Peak Carpark.
The race will be a time trial format with riders leaving at 30 second intervals.

We will crown the 2010 Makara Peak Grand Loop Mens and Women World Champions – I pity the fool who misses this race!
This is what happened last year...
http://www.bushloveracing.com/2009/03/makara-peak-grand-loop-time-trial.html

Any questions or offers to volunteers can be directed to Mr T assistant (via the Bushlove email address above). Bushlove pays it's volunteers in chocolate...

See you all there!

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Welcome to the newest Bushlove Junior

Congratulations to Tiger and Jacinda on the arrival of their baby boy Logan James Bushlove Keith born 13/3/2010, weighing 8lbs.

Well done guys, awesome news!.

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The Painting Man Cogitates On His New Life In M3

A splendid random guest blog - A brutally hijacked and copy/pasted letter from the mighty Painting Man to the Godfather... reminiscing on his recent M3 National Title and why on earth he and Marco are not in the Bushlove Team.


Ian Paintin scores a massage from multisport legend, Liam 'Vin Diesel' Drew after the Nats race.



Dear Marco.....


I trust the legs are well, no doubt due to the minimal resistance your carbon wafer presents even on the steepest hills.

Now is a good time to look back on the last two weeks of riding.

It started with our [mild] collective disappointment on learning our applications to join Bushlove were rejected.

I took matters into my own hands and reasoned the highly organized corps would have left a paper trail as to their decision. Much like the Germans who could have got away with a lot more had they not written about it.

It was easy to hack the Bushlove server, quaintly named TiggerBite. Two folders were scrutinized. One, labelled Wishful, is a collection of podium shots with various Bushlove heads superimposed on real winners. No doubt this is some team building tool to extol the boys to higher things. Drawing on my agricultural upbringing, and armed with Photoshop, I contributed some other shots taken from best in show at the A&P.

The other folder, named The Staring Committee, yielded the good oil. I thought it was a typo but no, the first order of business is to stare at Ricky's calves and then measure them, expressed as a ratio of F A [flaccid to aroused]. Apparently, my numerous cruise by approaches on Ricky during races has really got to the team; they want to know why riders like you and I, with legs that if on a chicken, would be rejected by Tegal, can monster those calves with impunity.

So, here is the rub so to speak. We are simply too good for our age. Being old enough to have sired some of them, our ability to beat them is causing grief. No doubt by adding in some handy road riders at the younger end they can address this problem over time.

I did not want to discuss this aspect with you prior to the National Champs as you would only have got upset.

I thought the best approach was to do my normal Ricky sidle somewhere during the race just to prove the point. I was equally interested in how some riders got their nick names. [Mono would have to wait until the after-race hot shower]. Take Angry for example. Seems like a well mannered chap not prone to outbursts. My plan was simple, I'd keep on his date during the hill climb; perhaps being stoned or pitted was the background to his moniker.

I had not counted on Mr Lawn. He got between me and Angry so with a burst of elderly zest I climaxed at the summit before he did. A nifty piece of passing on the ski slope had Lawny in front again. "Tricky" I called out; "No, Ricky" he responded. Hmmm, where was this race going? True, they both lacked the lush facial hair I sported; more a few tufts here and there. Perhaps this was some club I was also excluded from?

No, I could not consider reducing my foliage to join this picnic. Had I not preloaded it with the main food groups during breakfast as race fare? And had not Rob Kilvington been mightily impressed pre-race when I uncoiled my tongue to lick a sideboard?

With Lawny on a mission to ensnare Ricky I settled in to go hunting Angry men.

Later I learned that Lawny lay in wait, draped provocatively in the long grass by the water tower hoping to impress Ricky. I now wonder what DNF actually means; did they not consummate? No wonder when I passed Ricky on the second lap he was a distraught man.

The second lap had Bushlove spies at work on the ski jump. I was "warned" that Angry was less than a minute ahead. I laughed this off, referring to my M3 classification, but knew that I was sprung. After all, second place in M2 was behind me so the natural order was already upset.

I did briefly consider ingratiating myself with some of the worthy Bushlove foot soldiers post race. Jason Goldie did introduce me to his youngest and there was an awkward moment where I thought it was obligatory to kiss the baby. Thankfully, he was mid stream in bringing up what recently had been down, so I felt the moment was not right.

I probably did us no favours on the Karapoti either; a mild push on the road coming home from the training ride had me in 22 seconds before Angry's time. Not very subtle I know but I could not help myself. Heck, it was only last year that I had been what Angry is now; the M2 National Champion and the old dog needed to growl a bit.

Your best bet for inclusion, Marco, is to disassociate yourself from me and perhaps not be so damned good.

ciao

Ian

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Karapoti - Bushlove's Epic Akatawara Antics

Hot on the heels of the National Champs was the 25th edition of New Zealand’s most famous race - The Karapoti. Bushlove had a keen squad of mostly old people in the main 50km race and young-gun Alex Bennett in the Kid's Race. A full cheering squad of smokescreens was in attendance, with Mrs Mono, Mrs Potter, a heavily pregnant (due on the day) Mrs Tiger, the Bennett whanau and The Mailman.

Executive Summary for those who care little for our indulgent blog posts:

Bushlove takes Team award.
Goldie – 6th Overall – 2hr31
Mono – 7th Overall – 2hr32
Harry Potter – 8th Overall – 2hr33
Tiger – M1 3rd – 2hr37
Angry – M2 3rd – 2hr45
Slacky – 2hr48
Waghorn – 2hr55
Davo – 1st Retro – 2hr56

Even with a good smattering of epic spills all the boys gave a good account of themselves, with top dogs getting so close to the 20’s.

Congrats to all the racers who braved the course and thanks to all the marshals. If there is nothing on TV and the other websites are broken, feel free to continue through these silly reports:


Mailman The Spectator

After my epic rib-breaking freeride rampage, I was benched for Karapoti this year. But all was not lost, I got to partake in some proelite spectating with the Bushlove smokescreens. My day included providing last minute motivational advice (aka abuse as riders crossed the river and heading up the road to the Karapoti gorge), protecting smokescreens from feral coffee cart ladies (Mrs Potter would have been attacked by the Wicked Witch of the coffee cart if I didn't step in), helping plan the future careers of junior cyclists (after Alex Bennett's storming race debut - Well done Angry Junior!) and partaking in a bit of proelite eating (hot chips, donuts and all the Nature Valley muesli bars I could get my hands on - yummy!).
While I have enjoyed watching and supporting at the Karapoti this year, I really do prefer a bit of freeride rampage. Can't wait to get back on the bike, because if I don't I'm on my way to being the Bushlove BMI champ (mmm where did I put that icecream...).

Nick goes pro

Karapoti was to be my first ever PRO ELITE race and I was more than a little nervous. Lining up with the big guns of NZ mountain biking I felt like a fraud, after all I didn’t have the shop kit, sponsors, coach, NZ bike licence, goals (wtf are they?), training program, placebo pants, spare time or carbon fibre wunderbike. Befitting my completely unpro status my race was full of PRO ELITE fails but I still managed to pull off a cracking result of 8th overall, 7th in Pro elite. They even gave me prize money to buy a pro-size Snickers milkshake at Fidels. Just sifting pro elite stylz ftw.

I won’t bore you with all the details so I’ll just give you my highlights:

*Lining up in the river for the gun. So pointless, but so Karapoti classic.
*Steaming up the gorge in the chasing pack.
*Not getting dropped OTA on the first climb as expected.
*Uphill RAMPAGE on the Devils Staircase. (Being completely non pro I’m very used to walking)
*Getting to follow Mono for parts of the race. Even my Mrs was checking him out after the race. Fair enough.
*Bushlove man-train of Goldie, Mono and Myself steaming down Bigring to Dopers. I can only imagine it was like an Il Treno Delore ride except we all had clothes on and there wasn’t a bar of soap in sight.
*Having an epic high speed spill on Dopers bending my bars around and ripping some chunks of skin off my legs and shoulders (actually in retrospect not such a highlight) *The support of the BLR babes (and babe for the day - BGA) at the finish.

Pretty happy with a 2:33.23 in proper Karapoti conditions. With such a PRO ELITE result surely now I’ll be beating off the sponsors. (All enquires to Leonidas of Sparta press secretary subject line: "I want Nicks hinge").

Davo

Retro stylze on my refurbished '89 Nishiki Ariel. Tange frame and rigid fork with elevated stays, full original Deore DX groupo, Tioga T-Boner stem, front derailleur pulley fabricated from freshly minted English tuppenny coins. Toe clips and straps of course. Epic Retro Radness. Bike review coming soon.

Paddled slowly across river; spent 20mins getting into toe-clips; up gorge at medium weekend warrior pace; climbed badly; walked a bit; descended out of control; got to Rockgarden, locked toestraps down hard to ensure full commitment; RAMPAGED down all drops, dropping a few riders as I ping-ponged off the rocks; got to easy bit, went over bars, feet locked to pedals, feasted on Shit Sandwich; lay on face under bike, managed to reach toe straps to release the buckles; ambled up Staricase carrying farm gate; hooned Bigring Boulevard; climbed Dopers like old people have sex; epic calf cramps in river, straps locked tight, fell like chopped tree, for well needed bath; crossed line Sub-3 as fantasized about FTretroW. Marco calculates that every second he beat me by, cost him $250.

Mono's Sandbag Story

After a fairly shithouse race on Mt Vic last weekend I'd been looking forward to Karapoti - no illness or crashes in the week before the race was a good start. After faffing about too long I completely missed any kind of warmup or any such pro nonsense. Got away from the river crossing well and led the race up the road towards the dirt. Dropped my chain off the inside of the chainring (somehow?!) not far into the gorge, so had to get off and get it back into place - not a big deal in itself, but I lost touch with the front bunch, and had to smash myself over to catch back up. Caught a bunch of about 8 not far before the warmup climb, but the leaders were long gone. Felt meh on the warmup climb, and pretty average on Deadwood. Got my uphill steam on somewhere after the staircase though, and felt pretty strong. That lasted until about 1/3 of the way up Dopers. I temporarily HATED running a single ring on the 29er as Goldfinger slowly pulled away from me. Finished up 7th in 2:32. Was keen on digging into the 2:20 region. Next year.

Summing up my race: Satisfactory. Could try harder.

Private Wagger Reports For Duty

I had an average start after scoffing some last minute pies, maybe 20th out of the creek. I scooted up the warmup and Deadwood without any trouble. Traffic was a bit of a nuisance. The nice thing about a bad start is you get to pass people all day, especially in the old codgers yardarm-don't-start-till-near-lunch grade. Mmm lunch. I was so focused ripping down the Rock Garden that I didn't notice I'd passed another Bushie. Wasn't until the bottom when I paused for a cuppa, that I placed the Angry salute of "Oi Waghorn!" I'd heard amongst the rocks. I exited the staircase about 20 metres behind Angry and continued to get distant glimpses of those fine CHAMP calves all the way to the top of Dopers. I felt pretty good up Dopers, mostly middle chainring, no cramp. Then just over the top I had a good old roly poly romp with the bike. A little bit of me on top, a little bit of bike on top. When I came to a satisfied stop on the dead straight, wide but quite slippery clay wet patch, my front wheel looked like a porcupine wearing a hoola hoop. The spokes are supposed to stay attached to both the hub AND the rim. I twisted the loosies up and it still turned through the fork but there was no tension in any spokes except the one that holds my back end together: can you say ‘pucker’? I gingerly rode the Dopers descent and gorge with my front end flopping about more than Davo after 2 beers. Despite that I enjoyed the day and shared in the Bushlove glory, cheers guys!

National Champ - Angry Bushlove

Karapoti 2010 is a tough race and the injury count high. My Doctors had informed me if I monged myself or got any sort of graze around my knee area they would cancel my long awaited knee operation. I decided to go ahead and race.

I hoped for a dry day but it wasn’t too be, another wet ‘Poti was on the cards, so I lined up next to the other double olds in M2 and we took off down the gorge, three of us building a lead pretty early on, no surprises that was Trevor Woodward, Nick Warring and myself. Trevor is impressive how he scythes through the traffic from Senior men and M1, the track is littered with people grovelling up the climbs. On the first descent someone crashed right in front of me and I steamed off the side to avoid it and Trevor and Nick were gone.

I only know one line down Rockgarden so played it safe and had to walk with the rest of the trampers. No epic rampage was to be had until Waghorn steamed right down the middle. That oldie really has the skillz.

Onto Devils and I kept checking back for Waggers, as I had re-passed him just before. I thought Trevor and Nick were long gone until I spotted Nick Warring up ahead, so we chased each other back and forth till we hit Dopers and I had the lead. Nick caught me before the summit and I caught him again on the descent. It went like this all the way to the finish line. I was first into the last river crossing but took the lower line and was up to my waist, Nick took the sensible line and beat me by 6 seconds, however we both lost to Trevor who finished in 2:41, with myself and Nick in 2:45. All the same pretty stoked with that as its 15 mins off my race PB despite the weather and traffic. Also I lost my sunglasses on course, so to win a new pair for 3rd was nice form. Karapoti takes away, but also delivers.

On the Sunday I took my final ride for a while with my son Alex up at Makara, that’s me done for the year really. This is the National Champ signing off.

Alex Bushlove

I lined up for some epic freeride rampage in the Year 3/4 (Ages 7 & 8) category of the kidz race. I have a father who is a National Champ, in case you didn’t know, so I knew I would smash this field right open. The race briefing said it wasn’t a race and participation was what it was all about. I lulzed at this as my Dad always comes first, at least that’s what Mums says.
Anyway the race started and I smashed it up the road and was in the lead bunch of 5 riders! Quickly into the river crossing at the end of the gorge, back down the gorge again and into the farm areas where I steamed a 10 year old, and over the finish line for 4th in a sub 19mins which is where its at for the kidz race. Next year I plan to smash my National Champ Dad, who’s so hot right now, very handsome and not at all ghey.

SlackBoy (Bushlove's Trailbuilding, Track Riding, DH god)

After a traditional shite start across the river and having 60 odd punters in front of me, the shanks lit up and I went up the road. I decided to let the front bunch go (read couldn't make it up to the front bunch) and instead settled for weaving around puddles. At the top of the gorge I settled into a wee bunch with Johnny Click, Blue top Ben, Hiskey, Pedally Pedley, and 1 or 2 others. Hiskey told me to stick with this bunch which I promptly disregarded with large amounts of bad language as I hit warm up climb and 3 pedal strokes in got chainsuck on a new drivetrain. Win!!

Buckets of oil got me through to near the top of the Deadwood climb before it struck again, and even oil this time wasn't curing it. So rolling the dog it was. By this time (mainly ‘cos I was riding like a Crossling - read slow as feck) Anika and the Godfather got on my wheel. Anika snuck past for a while, til my testosterone kicked in and I belted away. Into the Rockgarden and was forced to dismount to get past another rider, which meant I had to stay off for a while and run. Unfortunately for me, the Freak caught me. Garth got his giggles, and whilst I was riding like shit and nanna’ing my tires down, he was going gangbusters and flying. Rich went past me at the bottom of the staircase and at this point I wasn't even thinking that a Sub-3 was on the cards.

Part way up, Ant and the Godfather caught me sinking me further into depression.
Slapped lube on at the top, and rolled the dog once more. Caught the Godfather smack bang on teh top of Big ring and powered past. Fully opened her up and let rip, caught Ant about halfway and edged past. Disappointed my fans at the Cloustonville turnoff by riding slow, but pulled in Kurt Lancaster on a dh stretch which I was happy about. Chain got a mint clean in the creeks and some more oil at the bottom of Dopers and I was golden. Ant was in view behind me at the bottom but I wasn't to be denied a good finish. Rode the bottom 3rd with Richard Anderson, who had been suffering mechanicals, till I was nearly passing out and let him go. Marcello came past far to quickly to not be on drugs or something. I sucked back a cheer pack, and then noticed Anika a corner back. Oh hell no! Got some form of legs back and kept that gap to the top, when upon me came the mist of pace.

Pinned to the bottom, rode the river and the dog was rolled, at times the 40:11 in the 29" wheels lacking as the pace was hot and high. Just past the top bridge and I rolled past Richard who had me all the way back at Devils. "Ahhh buggar" I heard as the calves of Doom crushed his soul. Mashed all the way to the end, barely able to see thru the grit and mud of the gorge. Smashed the river crossing and getting a 2:48. Not too unhappy with that as suffered with bad chainsuck and not feeling even 90%. But such is the Poti, and it's why we keep going back for more pain.

Tony The Tiger

Summarizing like my school teachers always have:

Tony tends to get distracted easily and veers off course often. He needs to apply himself more, which may help in achieving goals set by his peers. Somehow he scrapes through to accomplish an above average result. I fear this is off the back’s of others and will not last through any potential Pro/Elite future. My recommendation for him going forward is that he stays back a year in M1 until he has found some better direction. Best of luck for your future endeavours, Tony, you farking little pain in my side, I hope you fail at every gate. Regards Mrs B.Breaker.

The boring long winded version:

I came out of the river in third place, moving quickly up to first with Kyle Wood (2nd National Champs from the weekend before) drafting close by. As we entered the Gorge I upped the pace to see what Kyle's intentions were - to sit in and get pulled along for as long as possible it seemed! The On Yer Bike train of Josh & I, took turns steaming up the Gorge while Kyle sat in for the scenic cruise until we hit Warm Up climb. As the pain set in Kyle found the shanks that he had been reserving and put them into action, taking about 50m before the top of Warm Up. Not to fear as this was where my RAMPAGE ability would dominate. Laugh you may but I owned it as unlike the Nats, there were no large pines leaping onto the track. I was back in the lead for the briefest of moments before Kyle & Josh caught me up Deadwood. I caught Josh before the Staircase and romped up it, riding on for what I thought was a solid effort in 2nd place... only to have the cold shower turned on me by Gary Hall to put me back in 3rd! Turns out the M1 race started a little early leaving some riders to play catch up. Gary’s time was fast enough for 2nd but we never saw him. He must have floored it to get through all the traffic!

I arrived at the finish line to see my wonderfully pregnant wife still as one person. If you have not already heard, she was due to pop on Karapoti day, and is still currently one person.

Finishing time 2hr 37min. 22min faster than last year. No cramping. Turner was THE perfect bike for this race.


Goldfinger

I always wind people up by turning up at big important races and smashing past like a old, casual, hairy, torpedo.

I started well and got faster and faster. Wrote off the hopes of several Elite riders with my uphill rampage and dominated the downhills for good measure. I knocked out a few sets of press ups at the summits of most climbs, as I was not getting tired enough. At the top of Dopers I saw I had gapped epic uphill steamer Mono Sharpe, which was nice. I did some one arm pull ups in front of the marshals while breathing through my nose. Then I pulled 70kph wheelies down to the river, where I switched styles and lay on the saddle pedalling with my hands down the gorge, as the whole race was getting a bit easy for me and I needed to get a better workout. I did a jump over the last river crossing and rolled in a pleasing 6th place behind some of NZ’s best riders. 2hr31 and first hairy legged racer.

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